plot bunnies

I haven't eaten or slept in the last 24 hours in an effort to put things in order. Usually at this point in time I would be writing under the banner The State of My Union. The thoughts would be collected and flow steam-like. Not this time. I have so many things in my head right now that instead of a cohesive story, I'm nothing but plot bunnies hopping around, which makes for crazy rants and more trivial stuff to consume my time and honor this blog's name.

• I am not mad as much as I am disappointed. The level of disappointment is high because I was let down by myself. See, I try to look for good in all, specially people. Sometimes people are complete idiots, and yet I can find a connection. With idiots, I usually go for the nurturing side of me. I do my best to help them adapt and shine in their brief moments of possibility. Now, when people pose as idiots and I don't sniff it in time, I leave myself exposed in all my vulnerability. As of late I have been covering some one's ass in order to avoid them trouble, because I thought this person to be a lovable idiot, a pet project. Against all my sensors, the lovable idiot was nothing but a scum sucker out to get me, and I just recently found out. I went through the stages: surprise, outrage, immediate response, hurt, and finally, that big, deep feeling of disappointment that's been bothering me. I hate to go on the war path, but the gloves are off. If you have me in the cross wire baby, better make sure that I'm blown away, 'cause if I make it out unscathed, I'll take my time and come for you. I'll fuck you every which way, and you will see me coming, and I won't pretend to be what I'm not to get you.



• I love my perfect pink and whites, haircut shampoo blowdry style... when I feel like it, I'll flash a smile that will touch your heart, and when I really, really want to, on the chubby side and all... I have a rack and I know how to use it. However, when it comes to the very complicated dance/battle between the sexes, I tend to think like a guy, which is kinda scary, but I find it fun. So, don't even try it if yours are not bigger than mine, boy.



• I change moods according to my hair color. When I'm a brunette is all shy and withdrawn. Any shade of red will be fun, fun, fun. Blond, I tend to keep away from because it will make me crash diet and use my wits for evil purposes. It will unleash my tongue, to over compensate for the possible dumb jokes. As of late, the word platinum is buzzing and burning like a neon sign in the back of my head.



• Today's classic cheer is be aggressive, be, be aggressive... darn it's been a while.



• I have two Eric's in my Facebook. Both of them are quite striking. One of them is a fictional character- I'm a fangirl- shout out to Viking vampires!!!, woot, woot. The other one is quite real and much the stuff of legend. Self described as a "young, elegant guy who likes to make the best out of life and who is otherwise, very much compromised" Eric Perez is God's gift to Earth, I swear. Which brings me to think, God loves us all, who are we to hate one and other? This last couple of days I was shaken to the core as I followed an incident of hate crime in the Island, and caught myself with a knot on my throat thinking, it could have been anybody. It could have been my friend. Damn you, damn you to hell, all of you that corrupt principles of love to conceive your own ill willed theologies and create monsters filled with hate.



• Talking about friends, they do keep me grounded and help define me. My goal in life is to be half as faithful and true to them as they are to me, even when I'm going through one of those cult of personality phases and seem completely obscure.



• A final thought, random? Not if you know me.... Remember when the cover of NEAR DARK looked like this...

How come now it frigging looks like this?!@##...

I soooooooooooo hate the Twi-Effect, ten years from now, people will look back and think, what the heck we were smoking???? Come on join me... AAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHH!!!!!

The Quote:

"It's only possible to live happily ever after on a day to day basis."

- Margaret Bonnano